Going Back
by aivivi
Summary: It's been three years. Hitomi has been waiting but then she finally gets to go back. Although she meets this strager that warns her she may be getting into something deeper.
1. Prologue

Hi… This isn't my first fanfic although it is for Escaflowne. Sometimes people don't finish their fanfics, and, although I am a flake. I would like to finish this one as well as continue my other ones. So you wouldn't have to suffer as much as my other readers.. (Sorry ) I wrote several chapters so I could post one up weekly. I try to go with more quality than quantity. Please review so that I know what the readers prefer.

Disclaimer: I don't own Van, Hitomi or anything to do with Escaflowne except this story I have written with my own tears sweat and blood. Other fanfic writers, don't take my story or I will eat you.

Warning: This will be a trialsome journey for our Hitomi and Van. I will make them suffer! But that only helps them and you appreciate the happy ending… If there is one (DUN Dun Dunnnnnn… My choice, you deal with it). So on with the show.

Going Back

Prologue:

"Goodbye Van…" Hitomi was starting to tear up as she was about to leave for the mystic moon. '_I can't believe I'm leaving. But I don't want to go. I don't want to be alone_.' The thoughts in her head were starting to show on her face until she forced herself to look happy. Forced herself for him.

"Goodbye… Hitomi" Van stood there holding her hands in his. She was leaving but he wanted her to stay. But what could he do, that was her home up there and not here. '_She's smiling because she misses her home. What right do I have to ask her to stay. But if she leaves then I'll be alone._' He, however, couldn't force a smile.

"Van, I will see you again, right?" Hitomi pleaded. The look in his eyes were hurtig her but also giving her hope. Like he really didn't want her to go. _'Please ask me to stay.'_

"Of course you will. I'll always be here waiting." _'Don't leave me.'_

"Do you promise?"

"I promise."

"Then I promise too. I'll wait for you no matter what happens." _'Please wait for me.'_

"And I promise to wait for you." _'I'll wait for you if you wait for me.'_

"So we'll never be alone?"

"So we'll never be alone."

Those words made Hitomi sad and happy all at the same time. He was going to wait for her. She gave him a hug and was holding on so tight she didn't want to let go. He too held her close to his heart, although his heart was telling him to not allow her to go but to keep her there. It felt like they could spend eternity just staying there in each others arms. Slowly they pulled away. Looking in each other's eyes they started to lean toward each other. Hitomi closed her eyes and Van allowed his to flutter shut. But before their last farewell could commence a pillar of blue light descended from the heavens and pulled Hitomi to the sky, away from her beloved Van. Slowly the Dragon King let his winged goddess slip from his arms.

'I'm losing her.'

The look on his face tore at Hitomi's heart. It felt like she was abandoning him but she was too far now. All she could do is reach for him as the light pulled her upward and yell.

"Van! I promise to come back! What for me! And even though I never said this before I've always wanted to say that I…."

The light vanished. Then she was gone.

Van was left standing there with his arms to the sky. 'Hitomi.' She was actually gone. Again. This is the second time he allowed her to leave. His heart broke and he felt emptier than he had ever been in his entire life. Emptier the when his kingdom burned to the ground. Emptier than when he had lost her before.

The rain sky became dark and cloudy. Then rain started to fall and drip down his face. After an eternity he let his hands fall to his side. Then after a second eternity, he fell to his knees. Not caring about all the mud that catered to his body. He simply sat there looking toward the sky where Hitomi had just left. Taking his heart with her.

A wet trail started to flow from is eyes and down his face. Of course he wasn't crying. The Dragon King of Fanelia wouldn't cry and never allow himself to be so weak. No, these weren't tears. It was just the rain.

Just the rain.

Out on the side, under a tree protected from the rain but not protected from the coldness in herself. She felt Van's pain. She couldn't believe Hitomi actually left. And what's worse that Van let her leave.

"Oh Lord Van. Why did you let her leave? I know you wanted her to stay. Why couldn't you of just asked her… Oh Lord Van. What am I going to do with you."

With that she let her head drop as a few tears of her own dripped from her eyes. With this hurt, she couldn't go over and help or even comfort her lord. All she could do now was wish toward the sky.

"Hitomi. Make sure you hurry back for Lord Van. He's not as strong as he pretends to be."


	2. Silver Necklace

Disclaimer: I don't own Van, Hitomi or anything to do with Escaflowne except this story I have written with my own tears, sweat and blood. Other fanfic writers, don't take my story or I will eat you.

Warning: This will be a trialsome journey for our Hitomi and Van. I will make them suffer! But that only helps them and you appreciate the happy ending… If there is one (DUN Dun Dunnnnnn… My choice, you deal with it). So on with the show.

* * *

Going Back

Silver Trinket

It was pitch black all around. Emptiness. Nothingness surrounded and swallowed everything whole. Starting to panic she began run to nowhere and shouting but the words were swallowed before anything could be heard. Then out of nowhere, to answer her silent prayers, white feathers started falling down from the sky and a pillar of light surrounded her. The sound of the Fanelia lullaby kept ringing in her head as her body became weightless. She was almost there, back to the world that she remembered and couldn't forget. Back to Gaea… Back to Van…

* * *

BUZZ…. BUZZ…. BUZZZZ….. BUZZZZZ…..

"Oooooohhhhh not again!"

Hitomi groaned as she turned and slammed the alarm clock off. Just another dream she thought exhaustedly she collapsed back on her bed. She's been starting to get these a lot lately. It's been over three years since the adventure on Gaea began and ended. Trying to cover her eyes and go back to sleep, her futile attempt was thwarted by the streaming lights that made themselves present through the shades that covered her window. Finally, admitting defeat, she got up to take her shower and get ready for her morning practice that her track squad held everyday. She was a senior now and her life became even more of a routine, with practice and studies. But she insisted to herself that she would be happy, content and to stay positive because that is what she had promised Van.

That name. It had an elusive feeling to it. Almost afraid to say it louder than a whisper for fear that it would vanish forever. A shadow of a ghost of a person she remembers but nobody else believes exists.

"Hitomi! Are you ready yet? You're going to be late!"

"Yes Mom! I'm going to go now! Bye!"

Shaken back to reality, Hitomi pulled a windbreaker over her head and grabbed her infamous duffle bag with her schoolbooks and gear. Running from the door she started sprinting for the train station. The morning was still dark but the sky seemed to grey a bit. She looked at her watch as she slowed down in the flea market and saw that she had some time to rest a bit. She had a habit of stopping at a bench near the park for five or so minutes before the train actually arrived. She continued to walk to the bench routinely, although there was a stranger set up on the side of it. The girl mindlessly and mutely chewed the piece of toast she had snatched before she left home and situated herself within the shadow of the tree that cast it's darkness on the bench. Hitomi liked this spot the best, it reminded her the most of Gaea. It felt like she stepped out of her world to where the earth hangs in the sky. Gazing at her world, she watched it from the outside as people went about their business. Then, suddenly,a stranger spoke;

"Your presence seems troubled. It's as if you are looking through eyes that are from far away. But I may be wrong, are you a tourist or do you simply feel that you just don't belong?"

Surprised that this stranger could get this from her while she herself had never said a word, but simply sat down to eat her toast. Not to mention that she herself had just been thinking the same thing. Looking at this stranger she couldn't see his face because of the black hoodie and the fact that he had his back to her. It sounded like a man. He was sitting down in baggy jeans, one leg straight out and one propped up with both arms resting with his head leaning over them. On the set up in front of him, it seemed he was selling hand made jewelry of silver and stones. While observing the man continued to speak in an ominous voice.

"You've been there, …haven't you?" Ominous and mysterious it seemed to whisper as more of a statement then a question.

"Yes." She answered faster then she could contemplate. What exactlywas sheagreeing to. And suddenly a puzzled look overcame her face. And why did she answer yes? I felt like he was talking about Gaea but he couldn't know anything about it, he just couldn't… it wasn't possible… was it? The silence persisted for what seemed like an eternity. A breezed passed by knowingly to seize this moment of a vexed girl. The odd silent one just seemed to ponder by himself while she was tormentedas unasked question and unknown answers raced by a mile a minute until finally…

"Umm… Who are you?" was spoken by Hitomi but not after a brief hesitation. The man seemed to have not heard her so she was about to try her words again when.

"My name is Jikan. Pardon me. I didn't mean to pry. I just felt a familiar presence from somewhere far away and I thought you would know what I was talking about."

Dumbfounded she realized that she too felt the same way now that she thought about it. This however clearified nothing for her. Making her all the more curious and confused.

"Why don't you come over and look at my merchandise. I bet I have the perfect item just for you." Through all this talking, he hid his face in shadows.

Without thinking she stood up and moved to the front of his displayed jewelry. Scanning them, she had to acknowledge that they were all very pretty. Then suddenly, without even realized what she was doing, she reached for a simple elegant chain in the midst of a tangled pile. She started trying to pull it for it seemed to be stuck on something. She was surprised at her own determination while she frustratingly tugged the other chains away. A hand reached out and covered hers to seize her siege on the helpless mess of silver strings. Hypnotized by the hand as it carefully deciphered the complex pile and pulled out a silver engraved pendant but he held it so she could not inspect it clearly. Then she noticed that it was connected to the strand of silver still clutched between her fingers.

"It's odd how you happened to find this one. It seems that it just wanted to be found. I happened upon this a year ago, lost in the waters glistening only at night. Almost as if it picked me to help it along it's journey." She couldn't see his face for it was still hidden in shadows. He simply put the pendant in her hand, clasped it shut and pulled her nearer so her ear was near his mouth.

"I think it chose you now. Beware though, it could be a gift or a curse."

With that, he let her go and turned away once more. Completely dumbfounded she just stood there with no thoughts in her head and the necklace clasped in her hands. When she didn't budge, he spoke once more.

"You're going to be late. You better hurry or you'll miss your train."

Surprised and reflexively she looked at her watch, he was right, and she took off down the street. The suddenly she stopped and turned around in a state of shock.

"Hey… How did you know that I…" she started to say but stopped because as she turned around, there was no one there. A cold wind chilled her as she pondered but the sound of a train at the nearby station set her fast on her feet.

"Oh no, please don't leave without me. Please don't leave without me! I can't be late again!"

* * *

"Where is she? If she doesn't hurry she's going to be late!" Ukari was fretting about irritated that her friend might be late to early practice... Again! This might be the second time this week.She hadno idea what was keeping Hitomi, for she knew she was up early this morning because she called Hitomi's house and her mother said that she left a half hour ago. Tapping her foot in agitation, she had something she really wanted to tell and she would just die if she had to wait until after practice. This morning she got a text message for Amano who was still in America. It was asking her to come visit on their vacation and she had permission to bring Hitomi. Just thinking of that made her shut her eyes and squeal waiting forher best friend to arrive.

In the distance, the sound of running steps came nearer to the entrance of the track. It looked like Hitomi had ran all the way from the station and just in time too because the whistle blew for everyone to start their morning exercises. Panting she still came rushing over and started to strip out of her sweat suit and into her practice clothes.

"Hitomi! I have something that I justhave to tell you," jogging in stride with her friend trying to keep up, "Come on Hitomi! Wait a second and let me tell you something!"

"Sorry! If I don't start now I'm going to be late. Tell me after practice 'kay! See you later Ukari!"

Ukari could no longer keep up with her so she just dropped to the side and started to get out the track team towels. _'Aww no, now I'll just have to wait until the end of practice. I wanted to tell her now.'_ With this on her mind she went about her managing duties with a pouting look on her face. _'Well… At least she wasn't late today.'_ When moving Hitomi's neglected stuff to the side with the rest of the gear, a sound clinked to the ground that sounded something similar to falling change. Without thinking much of it Ukari merely dropped down and picked it up with the bag balanced in one hand. But for some reason the object in her hand didn't feel like change, so she inspected further. It was a necklace with an engraving that looked like something she seen before. Pondering and racking her brain, she concentrated on that thought because she had nothing better to do with her time until their races started where she would be keeping track of times.

This was driving her crazy. She just couldn't put her finger on it. She seen it before, she knew she did. Was it something important to her? No, she shook her head. She would've remembered a long time ago but it seemed important in some way. Dang it! What is it!

"Ah!" now she remembered. Hitomi drew something just like this in art class a long time ago. She said it was from that mystical world that she was transported to. The only conclusion she could come up with is that Hitomi had it made. By why now?The whole storywas still hard to believe and Hitomi had slowly ceased to talk about it over these past three years but every once in a while she would make a comment relating to the world like 'Oh, I've seen something like that' or 'That's just like what happened at Gaea.' Yes, that was the name. Gaea.

Ever since she started talking about Gaea she became more open to other people. She never talked about suicide or not belonging anymore. Ukari had asked her once if she was okay buther best friendsimply smiled and said that shewas alright. Nowadays, she grew her hair out just below her shoulders so she could put it in a pony tail or braid it. She smiled more and that started to attract a lot more popularity with the boys in school. Oddly enough, she barely noticed. Every once in a while a boy would confess his feeling and she would decline politely every time yet never gave a straight forward answer. Even for fun dates, she just simply said no and that she doesn't do that kind of thing. It wasn't that she thought she was better than everyone else... she just didn't. It was fine with Ukari because her boyfriend was in the U.S. so her friend was always available to just hang out, but Ukari always felt that she was holding Hitomi back.

Hitomi was participating in many activities; she took some self defense classes 'just in case'. She even went so far as taking a kendo class as well as violin and drama. She got better at math and English while still participating in track. It was hard for Ukari to keep up with her friend. As if she was obsessed with bettering herself. Hitomi still did use her tarot cards to read people's fortunes; she never had the nerve to ask her about herself and Amano though.

"TTWWEEEEEETTTTT! Ukari are you daydreaming! Get over her and be ready so we can start with the timed running!" Shouted the couch for the track team. Startled Ukari put the necklace down, she would have to ask about it later. Grabbing the timer she ran to the finish line.

"OKAY!

READY!

SET!

GO!"

* * *

Hey you ppls! How are you all doing! Sorry I've been taking so long but I'm trying to go into super mode and update all of my stories. Sorry if it's short but I promise to update sooner! Yay! Thanks to all those who are still loyal. Gomen… sigh Well anyways, can't change the past…. Or can you? XP

Aivivi


	3. What I want

Disclaimer: I don't own Van, Hitomi or anything to do with Escaflowne except this story I have written with my own tears sweat and blood. Other fanfic writers, don't take my story or I will eat you.

Warning: This will be a trialsome journey for our Hitomi and Van. I will make them suffer! But that only helps them and you appreciate the happy ending… If there is one (DUN Dun Dunnnnnn… My choice, you deal with it). So on with the show.

Hello everyone who are still hanging on to dear life to the Escaflowne tale. Sorry for taking so long to post this. I have more to this story and hope that you don't curse me for I am going to start updating a lot quicker. For now, all I can say is enjoy the fic.

Going Back

What I want

"Hitomi!"

"What?"

"Geez! You finally answer me! I was calling you at least five or six times already!"

"Sorry, it seems that I got a little distracted. What were you going to say Ukari?"

"Oh Hitomi. What am I going to do with you? But I'll forgive you this time because I have the most incredible news. Guess what!"

"…sigh…It has something to do with Amano…"

"NO its… wait… how did you know?"

"Your face always lights up whenever you have something to talk about that deals with Amano." Hearing this Ukari's face turned a few shades of pink. "Okay okay. Enough with the embarrassment. You've been together for almost three years now. What have you got to tell me that's SO great? Did he ask you to marry you yet?"

"Stop it Hitomi! You're just doing that to embarrass me!" The effect worked, however, because she started to turn a brilliant color of red. "Well, anyway, Amano has invited me to go over to the U.S. during vacation time and watch him run in the International High School Tournament! **Squeal**"

"That's great Ukari! Wow! I never knew he was that good of a runner! You are very lucky to have snagged that one."

"Yeah I know… Hey wait… Are you making fun of me?"

"No! Seriously! I mean it! You should go and take this opportunity to see the world and meet your boyfriend because I know there's a lot of pent up energy." Hitomi snickered waiting for her friend to react.

"Hey! That's not funny," She pouted, "Well anyway, he said I could bring you along! What do you think of that! Hah!"

All Hitomi could do was let her mouth drop. All the way across the ocean. All the way to America. She always wanted to travel there… But…

"Sorry Ukari… But I'd rather not go. I wouldn't want to spoil your trip with Amano. Plus, I'd feel like the third wheel." Hitomi gave a sad smile but facts were facts. It would be weird to travel around America with your best friend and your ex-crush when you know that all they want to do is make out. With this resolution, Ukari's happy mood seemed to drop down a few degrees.

"No you wouldn't be in the way Hitomi! Plus you need to get out or this place. Come travel with me. I promise it would be fun!" She smiled still hoping that her friend would go with her. She would like to be alone with Amano but she didn't want to abandon her best friend because Hitomi had never abandoned her.

"No Ukari. I'm serious. I want you to go and have fun."

"There's nothing I could do to convince you otherwise?"

"Nope… not a chance."

With that Ukari was torn at being happy and sad. Then she was ashamed with being happy at all. But all Hitomi could do was watch Ukari struggle internally while all she could do was smile. _'I'll be alright. I'll be alone but I will be alright.'_

"Oh yeah! Hitomi! You dropped this when you were getting ready for practice. It's pretty; it reminds me of the painting you did in art class a few years ago." She grabbed Hitomi's hand and dropped the necklace on the palm. Hitomi just stared at it because she had forgotten all about it this morning. Looking at the emblem surprised her even more because it had the engraving of Fanalia's dragon crest that was only for the royalty. In other words, only for Van. What was it doing here? Fear, anxiety, pain and uncertainty began to well up in the pit of her stomach.

Seeing the puzzled and pained look on Hitomi's face only bewildered Ukari even more. _'Why was she so surprised to see the necklace?' _She had been absolutely positive that Hitomi had someone make it for her to look like the picture she drew. This moment right here was when Ukari felt helpless to comfort, help or console any problems that her friend had because she wasn't part of 'that' world and could never answer her questions. So, thus, she tried to change the subject, to get out of the awkward moment that had settled between them.

"So… Well… I guess then, that only I am leaving tomorrow. I hope to see you at the airport before I leave. I can count on you, right? To see me off?"

Snapping Hitomi out of her reflecting, she retraced what her friend said and then replied.

"Oh… yes, you know you can always count on me. Except for early morning practices of course." They laughed a little.

Distracted enough, Hitomi placed the necklace around her neck. It felt right somehow. Just like when she wore her grandmother's necklace. Laughing both girls walked of the track field. School was cancelled due to the coming break as well as the fact that someone pulled a prank right before the break and the school smelled funny. They got to the point in the road which they had to part ways. They said their goodbyes and left. Hitomi was still brooding on what all this meant. First the dreams, then the stranger named Jikan and now the necklace.

Ukari didn't leave until tomorrow. She had a long night ahead of her.

(Next day)

Hitomi was walking towards the airport where Ukari was going to take off in about an hour. She had been consumed and confused with her own thoughts. Their vacation had barely started and she was going to be left alone for quite some time. Even though she was very popular, she never made a group of friends to hang with her. It was always just Ukari. Who knows how dangerous it was to have her by herself for so long to brood in her thoughts of possibilities that would drive any other person crazy.

"What's going on?"

Walking and pondering and pondering and walking. _'What in the world did all this mean? There has to be something going on, but… what?' _She tried once long time ago to feel Van's presence but every time she tried, it felt like she was getting acold shoulder or perhaps… a rejection. This occurred a while ago and it made her feel so bad that she didn't try again after that. Then she was trying to console herself saying that he might of had a bad day. But her other instincts thought maybe something bad had happened to him or that he was hurt. She panicked a little but calmed herself down because she knew Van was stronger than that and she should be too. That was around two years ago.

That conversation with Jikan still resonated in her mind. _'It was lost among water… and chose me to help it along its journey.'_ Was it a coincidence that he had this necklace? But it couldn't be just mere coincidence that it had the 'Fanal' family crest on it and that she was the one who found it. There was just no way.

'_It could be a gift or a curse.'_

His words struck her to the very core, as if he plucked a string cord in her soul warning her. He knew something she didn't and it scared her but gave her hope at the same time. Would these occurrences mean that she may indeed go back to Gaea?

In the beginning of the end, when she first came back, she realized no time had passed. It made her feel like she was hallucinating and that she may have dreamt it all up. But she couldn't just categorize it all as just a dream. She wasn't imaginative enough to make all 'that' up. Besides, her grandmother experienced the same thing. And there's no way her heart could hurt so much for something that wasn't real… could it? After all this logical thinking, she accepted that it all happened even if no one else believed her. Eventually, though, she got Ukari to believe her, somewhat. But that was better than nothing.

As the years past, however, it dawned on her that she may never get a chance to go back. Yes, it was true that her grandmother went there but she never went back. Would the same fate happen to her? Would she grow old and hear nothing about Gaea until her grandchildren went there? Would she have to wait so long just to hear who everyone she cared about was doing?

With that in mind, it broke her spirit. That even though she believed with all her heart, that it wasn't enough. She didn't have the pendant that would help her back and Van didn't know how to use it so she couldn't count on him bringing her back. This is what hurt her the most. Like there 'was' no way back.

But, now, because of the appearance of Jikan, it seemed that she had a chance. No matter how slim it was still there. That the cogs of fate were beginning to churn once more. If not, at least she could keep a token from Gaea that could help her remember it was true. At least… that's what she told herself. But, in the end, she still wanted to go back with all her heart. Grabbing her necklace she stared towards the sky. Then…

Someone called her name.

Stopping automatically, she turned around to see who was there. But no one was. She thought she heard her name. Maybe she was hearing things but no… She couldn't be hallucinating. Someone called her.

"_Hitomi"_

Did she just hear what she thought she did? Tears started to swell up blurring her vision but she refused to shed them. Without realizing it, she had walked back to the track field and not the airport. Eyes widening at the fear she might be bearing witness to. All these feelings were driving her crazy. She wanted to go back… she needed to go back. Finding her voice she spoke in a shaking voice towards what she feared.

"…Van?"

She started to walk toward the track field. It was like some force was pulling her. To hear that voice again. But the feeling of his presence suddenly vanished as if regretting what it did. Hitomi started to fell desperate. Three years of suppressed sorrows and worries started to ache through her entire body. Making her heart heavy and her limbs tremble. Suddenly ragged sobs broke through her entire being.

"Van! Where are you! Don't leave me alone! I don't want to be alone!"

Tears streamed down from pained eyes. Pleading to the sky she gave up all self-control to her emotions. She couldn't take it anymore. She had to see him. She hurt. She suffered. She worried.

And she was breaking.

In a frantic sprint, she ran to the exact spot in which she first left. She could almost hear the song, that lullaby that haunted her dreams. Scared that the sound would go away or that it was just her imagination, she concentrated as hard as she could on the sound. Then, suddenly…

…a light surrounded her…

She still thought she was deluding herself until her feet started to lift off the ground. She was almost there. She was almost able to go back to the world in which she had left her heart.

She was almost there.

To the world that she missed.

The world that had Van.

'…_Just a little further…'_

(Back at the airport)

Elsewhere, Ukari was fuming in a window passenger seat. That 'Hitomi', who was her supposed 'best friend', hand't come to see her off and she was just a 'little' peeved to say the least. She wanted one last chance to see her to make sure she was going to be okay. Her journey was going take a long time and, now, it seemed that she was going to worry the whole way. Staring outside the plane as it took off from the black pavement; Ukari could see the entire city beneath here. Leaning her head on the window, she started to feel guilty about Hitomi. Then, all of a sudden, she thought she was seeing things. A blue pillar of light had ascended near the school. The track field to be exact.

'_What in the world?' _She thought to herself, _'…I… recognize that light… And… if it is… what I think it is… then…'_

Ukari then smiled.

'_Well… look who else is going on a trip. Have fun Hitomi!'_

Arthur's note:

No I am not done with this fic. I'm actually working on the story line. I have a general idea of what I want in it but if you have any suggestions on what should happen I'm open to ideas. Sorry to have taken so long to update. I promise to update a lot sooner okay. Well here you go. TO BE CONTINUED 


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